Kiss me, motobike?

Ok, I'll start with THE SCOOP:

We know where the invisible man is: Halong Bay, Vietnam!!

As soon as we set foot on Vietnamese soil, we are approached straight away by two men offering us a minibus ride to Sapa. Even though we're exhausted by our 8-hour bus ride from Yuangyang to the border, we bargain for 15 minutes until we get to an acceptable price. Then, we have to wait for the minibus. And that's when we realize that we're not in China anymore: everybody starts making fun of us. Of course, the funniest thing here is my height :-) They try to guess how tall I am (in average between 1.90 and 1.95m – thanks I'm not a giant yet) and then one of the two guys climbs on the small wall we're sitting on and says “me very short, up to kiss kiss”.

The minivan finally arrives, and within 2 minutes, we find ourselves squeezed between 5 other people and bags of clothes, food, and various pieces of furniture. But we're not ready to go yet. 20 minutes and 5 stops later, with 5 more people, 20 more bags, a couple of pig's feet and after several reconfigurations of the load, we hit the road to Sapa. At 10 km/h. Still passing cars and scooters in every curve. And of course, after 10 minutes, we run over a dog. Welcome to Vietnam.

But we have to admit, Sapa is worth the ride. A small town set in the mountains, surrounded by fields and rice terrasses, where water buffalos peacefully graze under the sun (or the clouds) (or on the soccer field).

As an old lady trying to sell us postcards says: “Sapa Ouh-la-la!”

We quickly learn to dodge the scooters in the street (matter of life or death) and to ignore the evergoing honks, the women selling bags and bracelets everywhere (to their complaint “no buy, cry” we learn to answer “no buy no cry” - it works even better when you sing it) and the everpresent posters of uncle Ho.

We also discover the specialties of the region:

- the stretched-leg chicken

- the scorpio liquor

- and - as a special tribute to our north american friends who taught us so much about canning – the pickled geckos

We go for a one-day trek in the mountains – 17km, average difficulty, hehe it's soooo easy for us now! Here too the farmers are working in the fields, harvesting rice.

After a few relaxing days in Sapa, we take the night train to Hanoi. The train is on time, the beds clean and comfortable. We sleep well. Too well. At 5.30am, Sylvine taps on my shoulder and says “We're in Hanoi. Now.”  The train has already stopped. We don't know how long the train will stay here, so we start gathering our stuff as quickly as possible. I'm still passing our backpacks down to Sylvine from the highest berth when the train starts moving. Sylvine shouts “go, go!”, I jump down the berth, we run to the doors and jump down the train. Yes, we made it! With all our bags!

Of course, the train wasn't leaving, but only adjusting its position. 15 minutes later, it still hasn't left the station. Great. Ok, we've still learnt two good lessons from that incident:

a) when you travel by train in Vietnam, always keep all your belongings gathered together

b) we didn't know it before, but we can actually wake up and get ready to go in less than 30 seconds. No more excuses.

So, Hanoi. Vietnam. "Le pays du matin calme". Yeah, right. That was before the scooters.

So, Hanoi is VERY busy. Crossing the street is like jumping from a bridge in the middle of a highway, but instead of cars, it's only scooters. Thousands of scooters. At first you try to avoid them, but you quickly realize that you cannot predict their moves. Then you just walk across the streets, your eyes shut, and pray for your life. It works, we're still alive.

We notice here too that Vietnam still bears the marks of French colonialism: the architecture, the French baguettes sold everywhere by street vendors, and of course the translations from Vietnamese to French instead of English (another opportunity for good laughs).

For the food review, we try the Cha Ca, a fish specialty apparently cooked in only 3 restaurants in Vietnam (according to Lonely Planet, so you might not want to rely on this info). True or not, we don't care, it's delicious!

We also find the steamed buns again, to my delight

and this time it's full of surprise – noodles, quail's eggs, and other undefinable things

Of course, the Pho and its famous chinese kruders

The Vietnamese coffee (first tried without the condensed milk, but it's a once-in-a-lifetime, I don't think our stomachs and our taste buds are made to support that)

And of course, we hit the street terrace for a beer

no I don't feel tall, you're wrong.

After a couple of days in the midst of the city pollution, we leave for a 3-day trip on Halong Bay. Even under the clouds, and sometimes the rain, the bay is stunning (and so peaceful after Hanoi!).

On the agenda:

- homestay on an island with wonderful hosts,

- bike ride among water buffalos (scary)

- taming the scary buffalo,

(not there yet, we definitely need some practice here)

- swimming in the bay at sunset,

- enjoying the view from the boat,

- visiting a floating village,

(you'd better get along with your neighbors)

(in particular when they can see you in bed)

homemade motorboat?!

- and of course - I guess you're expecting it now - yummy food....

Also on the schedule, many laughs thanks to our guide Cuong, who will probably end up in hell if he doesn't stop making fun of his compatriots... He explains that Vietnamese people usually mix up the letter L and N, and always laughs at their accent... “Hello, excuse me” becomes “Heno, Kiss me!”... and the invariable “Kiss me, Ladies and Zentleman!” everytime he wants to tell us something...

Of course, we try our first rice wine shots offered by the chef of the boat – “button up” as  requested by our somewhat drunk guide... Verdict: it tastes like gasoil and it hurts. As Cuong would say, the next day, “we're hanging over”.

Back to Hanoi for a day, just enough time for a few Phos – very good when you're hanging over – and we're off to Luang Prabang, Laos.

Comments

[henri]

steamed buns....................

[henri]

steamed buns....................

[Sab]

Oh boy, you are soooooooo lucky to be in Vietnâm! I would love to go there! And thanks to your ever so funny posts (you should publish them in a travel book!) and stunning photos, I know I will just have to go there!
It's always a plesure to read about your adventures, you are really good in writing about them! Look forward to the next ones!
Where are you heading now???
Take care!